I Get to Eat Cat Food! The Doctor Said So.

I told you all last time that I got sick and had to go to the doctor. And when I got there and they weighed me, they found out I was losing weight that wasn’t on purpose. I was holding steady at around 134 pounds before this.

I even showed you this picture of me in the same frame as a delivery truck, NOT barking at it. It was very sad. And now that I am feeling better, I am disappointed in myself. But I made up for it this morning by barking at our Chewy delivery, so all is not lost.

I can’t believe I let this one get away without a bark!

Let me tell you more about the hospital. It was terrible. They were very nice to me, but it was still awful. I slipped and fell because I was so weak and twisted my leg, too, so I had trouble walking. And I had to wear a cone. I lick my front arms a lot and they said I would have accidentally licked out the IV. Cones are terrible. Even the soft ones. Don’t ever let them put a cone on you if you go to the hospital.

I had to stay in the hospital for two whole days. I was very upset. But Mom came to visit me every day. And then they finally took off that embarrassing cone so I could go home with her. I’m telling you, don’t ever let them cone you!

I was still very weak, and Mom had to practically carry me. It made it very hard to go to the potty, and Mom and I struggled that first night home. I weigh almost as much as she does.

But Mom is smart, and the next morning, a rear lift harness was delivered for me to make it easier to walk. Mom had ordered it while I was in the hospital because she knew I would have some trouble when I got home.

I quit eating too. That was the worst part. Food just didn’t taste good. And you know how much I love food. But I turned down everything. Even people food and cat food.

Mom had to shoot liquid supplements in my mouth. Mom was mean. She made me take them even though I didn’t want them. Those syringes are the worst thing ever invented. Mom gave me Doggie Ensure, a calorie supplement that was yucky sweet and vanilla-y, goat’s milk, and bone broth. Not all at once. She would give me a little bit at a time all day long, bothering me when I was so sick and just wanted to sleep. Everybody was trying to get me to eat. Irony at its finest. For the past two years, they have all been depriving me of food on this ‘diet’ thing. That first picture down there is at Muddy Paws because Melissa tried to feed me too. It was the only place I would eat for a few days. Mom took me up every day because I nibbled a little bit of Melissa’s good doggie treats. She sells the best and, even though I was sick, I couldn’t resist tasting them.

Mom also stuck needles in my scruff and “filled my camel hump” as she called it. She said this was keeping me hydrated and that I will have to have “sub-cute fluids” for the rest of my life. That’s a terrible name for them. It makes perfect sense because I am very cute and it goes under my skin. But they should call them “owie water” or something. It would be more honest and you would know it isn’t something fun. It makes me very cold even though Mom hangs the bags of water over the heater vent first.

But most importantly, out of all of this came a Doctor’s Edict that cannot be disputed. You see, when I finally felt like eating again, Mom just happened to put a dish of the cats’ leftover food under my nose, in desperation to get me to eat something, and I immediately grabbed one of the cat food flavors. She handed me more, and I picked that flavor off every one of the dishes. It is my favorite. So Mom opened a whole can of it, just for me, and I gobbled it up.

She asked my vet, and he pronounced that I am now allowed to eat cat food if I so choose because it is better than eating nothing. HA! I won. I get to eat cat food now. And Mom said she is going to go to the store and buy me a whole case of the big cans so I get enough to eat.

I’ve started eating other stuff too. It isn’t good for you to have only one thing. You need all different kinds of vitamins and have to eat healthy. But still, HA. I get to eat cat food any time I want. I was 111 pounds at my lowest and am now back up to 114-the scale was fluctuating between 113.8 and 114 when Mom snapped the picture. Mom is calling it 114 because the woman wants me to weigh more now. She’s just never happy! But I get to eat cat food. So I am happy.